As someone who has navigated being a part of a blended family, I know the unique challenges that come with combining two families into one. There are never ending awkward moments, miscommunications, and plenty of (manic) laughs along the way.
I am just taking this moment to vent about the challenges that come with being in a blended family:
Who’s the parent here?
One of the biggest challenges of being in a blended family is figuring out the parenting dynamic. Is it the biological parents who call the shots, or do the step-parents have a say? And what about when there are step-siblings involved? It can be a real balancing act, with everyone trying to find their place in the family hierarchy. And what if one of the parents isn’t pulling their weight…do you step in. No one knows!!! It’s all a mindfuck.
Double the holidays, double the fun?
Blended families often have to navigate multiple sets of holiday traditions, which can be both exhausting and entertaining. One year you might be having a traditional Xhosa thanksgiving ceremony in Mount Ayliff with your dad’s family, and the next you’re decorating the Christmas tree with your step-dad’s and his kids in suburban Cape Town. It can be a lot to keep track of, but apparently it’s also an opportunity to experience new traditions and make new memories. Whatevs.
Keeping up with the exes
When you’re in a blended family, there are likely to be multiple ex-spouses floating around. And not all are sane, reliable or friendly. This can make things complicated, especially when there are children involved. To avoid trending on Twitter, jail time or just being as ass to the kids, it’s important to try to keep things civil and avoid any unnecessary drama. But that’s easier said than done – trust me, I know.
The dreaded “step”
Let’s face it, the word “step” doesn’t exactly have the best connotations. Step-parent, step-sibling, step-child – they all sound a bit awkward and forced. But as much as we might try to avoid the term, its documented that it’s an important part of being in a blended family. A reminder that these relationships are unique (f*cked up) and require their own special attention (read: are life-draining).
Blending personalities
Finally, perhaps the biggest challenge of being in a blended family is simply learning to get along with one another. With so many different personalities in the mix, there are bound to be clashes and disagreements amongst the various psychos and misfits. But at the end of the day, everyone is in this together (hopefully or so they say), and with a little bit of patience and a lot of humor and wine, anything is possible.
So there you have it – the challenges of being in a blended family. I have no positive conclusions here. Like I said at the beginning, I just needed to vent!!!!