Divorce is one of the most painful experiences that anyone can go through. It’s a time of upheaval, uncertainty, and deep emotional pain. Whether you’re the one initiating the divorce or the one who is being left behind, the devastation of divorce can be overwhelming.
At first, it might feel like your world is falling apart. You might feel lost, scared, or numb. You might struggle with feelings of anger, sadness, or guilt. You might wonder how you will ever be able to move on from this pain.
But even in the midst of all this devastation, there is hope. Here are a few things to keep in mind as you navigate this difficult time:
- You are not alone. While it might feel like you’re the only one going through this pain, remember that millions of people have gone through divorce before you. There are support groups, online forums, and therapy options available to help you through this difficult time. I had an amazing therapist at Akeso Clinic named Deirdre – she cut to the chase and didn’t hold back her opinion which is what I needed. What a godsend!
- Give yourself time to grieve. Divorce is a loss, and it’s important to give yourself time to grieve that loss. Allow yourself to feel your emotions, even if they are difficult or painful. Cry when you need to, take time off work if you need to, get on meds if you need to and be kind to yourself. During my divorce I was on anti-depressants, anti-anxiety and sleeping tablets. They saved my sanity. And when I was stronger I stopped taking them but during that time, they saved my life.
- Focus on self-care. During this time, it’s important to take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, eating healthy foods, and getting regular exercise. Consider seeking out therapy, meditation, or other stress-reducing practices. I remember gyming with my bestie Dom every day at 9am. Those sessions were not just good for my body but for my mind cause I had an hour and a half to open up and share and cry if needs be.
- Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Whether it’s from friends, family, or a therapist, it’s okay to ask for help when you need it. Sometimes, having someone to talk to or to lean on can make all the difference. So many people helped me during my divorce…financially, emotionally and in terms of time resources. They were angels sent to make the path easier and I am forever grateful.
- Remember that healing takes time. There is no magic formula for getting over a divorce. Healing takes time, patience, and persistence. But with time, you will start to feel better. You will start to find your footing again, and you will begin to rebuild your life. Only 5 years later do I feel whole again. Feel like myself again. It takes time. You will fall, doubt, wonder and cry but one day the sun will shine again – and shine even brighter. Hang on in there!
In the end, the devastation of divorce is real and painful. But with the right support, self-care, and time, it is possible to move forward and create a new and fulfilling life for yourself.